By Lincoln Depradine
The start of a New Year always is filled with a combination of angst, expectations and resolutions.
Angst is often fuelled by a concern over something relatively importance such as finding a job, passing an examination, one’s health, or paying the bills that accumulated from overspending at Christmas.
On the opposite end, expectation is engendered with a more positive outlook over something like a wedding; a birth; overseas travel to study, work or live; a job promotion; or a rise in pay.
Resolutions are too numerous to mention. And many are abandoned before the calendar flips over to February.
Having said that, I myself have resolved to do some things this year. One is trying to get Diana Nyad to visit Grenada.
Nyad is the 64-year-old American woman who, on her fifth attempt, successfully completed a swim from Cuba to Key West, Florida.
She swam for more than two days. At one point, Nyad was vomiting because she had so much salt water in her system and was shivering.
“For 49 hours the wind just blew like heck, and it was rough,’’ Nyad said.
During the entire journey, never did she once encounter a shark; only some jellyfish gave a little trouble. I guess the sharks in the waters between Castro’s Cuba and Obama’s United States are well fed.
Since Nyad is such a good swimmer, I want her to attempt a crossing between Grenada and Carriacou.
Kick ‘Em Jenny is behaving these days, so she shouldn’t have any trouble there. If Nyad makes it from the Carenage to Hillsborough, it would provide more world exposure for Grenada than what has been gained so far from the exploits of Kirani James.
Speaking about Kirani, I plan on embarking on a project on his behalf this New Year.
I’m playing match-maker; I want to hook up Kirani with Rihanna, the Bajan-born recording artist, actress, and fashion designer who will turn 26 next month.
Kirani, Olympic champion and Nike, LIME and Grenada Co-operative Bank pitchman, visited Grenada in September to celebrate his 21st birthday, and again this past Christmas.
Rihanna is already one of the best-selling artistes of all time. She has sold more than 30 million albums and 120 million singles worldwide.
Notwithstanding Fay-ann and Bunji, Kirani and Rihanna could become the first genuine Caribbean power couple; a power couple like Jay-Z and Beyonce or David Beckham and Posh Spice.
More than that, with their combined earnings they could help pay off the national debts of both Grenada and Barbados.
I would encourage them, too, to establish a regional media empire like Rupert Murdoch; something that incorporates print media, radio, television and the internet.
For the Grenada subsidiary of the business, there’ll be a three-storey media complex with a printing press for publication of a daily newspaper.
I’m advising Kirani and Rihanna to hire all the local veterans of media to manage the outfit.
We’ll even be bringing Allan Palmer, Ray Smith and Bunny Fletcher out of retirement (sorry, Cheryl, the ole man is ranked ahead of you).
Mr Palmer will work on the technical aspect of the radio and television operations, with fellars like Tallboy Alexander, John Phillip, John Jerome and Hindso.
They also will be work for people like Jerry Romain, Josephine McGuire, Eslee Carberry, Eugennie Mason, Flyers Redhead, Alvin Clouden, Troy Garvey, Rawle Titus, Hilderbrand James, Milton Coy, Andre Donald, Odette Campbell, and Beverly Sinclair.
The on-air crew will be led by Lew Smith, Harold Pysadee, Shirma Wells, Michael Bascombe, Leslie-Ann Johnson-Cornwall, and Jeffrey “Tomars’’ Aird.
Yes, we need an encore from Tomars; an announcer who used to spin a Jackson Five tune and when the music finished, he would let listeners know that the Jackson Five were “five brothers – all boys’’.
I would like to get Ray Roberts in on this new media entity. But my good friend looks like he’ll be tied up in the Senate for the foreseeable future; unless, of course, he decides to retire and give the senate position to mi brethren, Justin Campbell.
Some of our young hardworking reporters and announcers will be getting work too and will be sharing in the high-paying jobs; we’re not forgetting the youth.
I’m drafting Ray Donald, Ruggles Ferguson and Kamau McBarnette to sit on the board of directors that will be chaired by Patrick Smikle, with Cynthia Budhlall as chief financial officer.
So, that’s a cursory insight into what the management structure of “KiRi Global Media’’ would look like.
But, I have a backup plan – just in case Rihanna is not available or she’s harbouring thoughts of renewing her romance with bad-behave Chris Brown.
The backup is hitching Kirani with Serena Williams, the greatest female tennis player ever.
Serena just beats everybody – left, right and centre. She struggled a bit with the wind at the final major, the US Open, in September. But, eventually, Serena put away Victoria Azarenka and collected US$3.6 million in small change.
Serena’s estimated net worth is more than US$100 million. About half of that is from tennis; the next 50 percent is from things like endorsement.
She has earned more money than any other female tennis player, including sister Venus, who is a two-time US Open champ.
Serena’s win last September in front of a packed Arthur Ashe Stadium in New York was her fifth U.S. Open title and her 17th Grand Slam championship. She’s now just one major away from Chris Evert and Martina Navratilova on the list of most major titles in the Open era.
Retired German player, Steffi Graf, won 22 major titles.
Serena has two shots at becoming Grenadian: by marrying Kirani and becoming Mrs Serena James; and under the Citizenship by Investment program.
I hope, like most people, I do not break my New Year resolutions faster than I made them.
In any case, wish me luck while I wish all of you happy New Year!
