by Dr. Neals J Chitan
I can only imagine the good psychosocial maturation intended by the 1985 Philadelphia based R&B award-winning acapella group Boyz II Men, as they chose that name. However, over the past few decades I have observed a major maladaptive shift in the male maturation process that has rendered more criminals on our streets and in our schools.
The successful development of a male child into a man is not only determined by physical growth but also critically determined by his psychosocial maturation and adaptation, which if well achieved can be an asset to himself, his family and his community. On the contrary, if left to himself, his negative influences and peers to navigate this developmental transition, he can become a man or a “premature” man who is a liability to himself and his family and a menace to his community.
The result of the transition process from child to man is seriously determined by the modelling and mentoring received. Male children who have gone through their first growth spurt in their early teens and have shot up to a physical resemblance of a man can be seriously deluded into believing they are men and begin behaving like the men around them.
Modelling and mentoring are critical aspects of male development and the kind of mentoring and modelling received by a male child will largely determine the kind of man he becomes. The teenage stage is the phase of development where a boy is leaving the fully dependant phase of his life and going through the interdependent phase making his own decisions, challenging rules and questioning authority while developing his own world view. It is therefore crucial that his adult models and mentors have a healthy social, emotional and business lifestyle if he is to adapt well and make the transition from interdependence to full independence as an adult.
As a Crime Reduction and Behavioral Modification Consultant who has worked within 10 Caribbean islands, the USA, Canada, Europe and Africa, I see the anti-social and criminal behavior stemming from bad mentoring in premature “self-perceived men” in our homes, schools, communities and juvenile court system. In schools, as far down as Grade 4 are experiencing the juvenile criminal behavior which they are not equipped to handle, and which takes the fun away from the teaching and learning experience. Principals’ offices are flooded with behavioral males who daily terrorize primary and high schools and who are frequently sent on suspensions back to the community or to juvenile centers.
What we do not understand is that our schools’ attendance registers are not only comprised of age -appropriate children but also of a set of “premature” self-perceived men who away from the school environment live, speak, behave and respond as their undesirable psychosocially bankrupt on-the-block male mentors with whom they hang out and whose lives they directly model.
Living and treated as “men” in their communities, without respect for parents, property, police and rules these teenagers because of their age are enrolled and enforced to go to school designed for children. Do you see the issue? When confronted by school authority on behavioral issues or poor work habits they behave and respond like they normally do on the block when faced with authority.
Frequently, we see weapons in school bags or hidden in strategic points on the periphery of the school property to be grabbed when school fights occur. Emotional bullying, physical assaults, sexual assaults, bodily harm, intimidation and threats even to teachers are daily occurrences in schools across the region with no exemption for so-called religious based schools. Police presence has to be called in some schools on a daily basis as local security personnel are frustrated and unable to deal with the challenges.
You see my friends, there was once a time when although hanging on the block, when a young child was observed close by, the older boys and men would drive him away from their company and send him home. Unfortunately, in the 21st. century of relativism and lawlessness, I have personally witnessed where young children are now glorified as “big man” when dared to be lawless by older men. I have seen them laughing and giving high-fives to disrespectful, cussing and confrontational children. In one instance a 9 year-old earned the name “Boss,” by the older men who would use him to commit petty crimes, no wonder our juvenile court systems are so seriously jammed with young offenders that Magistrates and lawyers alike are throwing their hands up in the air, totally incapacitated.
I call today on young and adult men including fathers to break the cycle of negative influence on our boys. Stop encouraging them in your criminal behavior as juvenile offenders who will only get a slap on the wrist while avoiding your consequences. I call on the powers that be to join us in engaging the community in meaningful and restorative dialogue to stem the tide of criminal behavior at a community and school level, and I pledge my continued interaction and support for breaking the cycle and changing our Boys to Men of Integrity.
About the Author:
Dr Neals Chitan is an International Social Skill Consultant and Crime Reduction Specialist who holds a PhD in Social and Behavioural Sciences and currently works in Grenada. He is the President/Founder of Motiv-8 For Change International a Toronto-based Social Skill Agency and can be reached from North America at 647-692-6330 and locally 473-416-8377 or at nealschitan@motiv-8.org
